Yom Kippur has me baffled

I have a very serious question and I need answers that are true and not really opinion. Here are my questions:

1. A person who holds to political views that hurt another group/race/culture, are they obligated to seek forgiveness from said group?

2. A person that hurts another without knowledge of causing said hurt, are they obligated to seek forgiveness from that person once that person informs them of the hurt? What about, if they don’t believe they did wrong?

3. In our bedtime Shema we say “Master of the universe, I hereby forgive anyone who has angered or vexed me or sinned against me, whether physically or financially, against my honor or against anything else that belongs to me, whether accidentally or intentionally, inadvertently or deliberately, by speech or by deed….. How can we get up the next day and post/say/feel the same ager and hate towards others that we felt the day before?

4. How do you forgive those that show hate towards a group/race/culture when they, themselves don’t see that they are doing it and therefore NEVER seek forgiveness for that pain they cause?

As you may see my heart is burden today as we move closer to Yom Kippur. I see post by my fellow Jews that are so filled with hate and pain and out-right distrust. I have, over the past few days been trying to figure out just how to forgive and let it all go, in spite of the fact, they, themselves have never sought forgiveness. I fear that we have become so engrossed in our “who’s right and who’s wrong” that we forgot that on both sides are people. We no long call each other brother or sister. It is now liberals vs conservatives and left vs right.

Yet, we are all to stand before the judge of all things and feel clean and forgiven. How can any Jew agree with such hopefulness and still believe he/she is a righteous person? Friends, my heart is heavy with these and other matters today.

Living in Germany, I see and feel the rise of the most hateful, vail people in all the world. Someone shared with me an incident that happened over the weekend at Ikea. A group of young men were calling names to certain people who were going to shop. When reported to the store, they called the police and the men were removed. What I found most troubling is the fact they felt OK to do such a thing. One older women said to me, this is how it all happened before.

Post pack out and PCSing

This might only be understood by those who left Christianity. In the morning, I had a routine of worship. I would wake and turn on some worshipful music and pray. As a Jew, I pray, albeit different, and often with less joy. (Truth can be hard to admit).
Over the pass few years I’ve tried to find Jewish music that had the worshipful connections to it. I found maybe one or two songs that I really connect with.  It is not to say that there aren’t songs within the Jewish genre, it is just that I have not found them.  

When ever I try to find something familiar, I often stop myself from singing it because it contains verses that I no longer hold to be true.  We are in the mist of our PCS move out and the house is pretty empty house and quite.  There are no chairs to sit on or tables to work from.  I find reading hard because I am always laying on the floor, which is super hard, or I am standing and holding the book.  I can;t really study like I would would like right now.  Music seems to be my only true outlet and I don’t have it to calm my soul.  

I often feel my mind is going a hundred miles an hour and there are no breaks to slow me down.  I’ve been thinking about spending my days at the book store.  At least there I would have a chair, a table, and some good coffee…..hahaha

We are living out of our suitcases.  Some have asked why did we ship our HHG so soon, well, I figured we could be comfortable here or there.  I wanted to ship them so that we will not have to wait months once we are there to get back to “normal” life, what ever “normal” is for an Armywife.  

Let your light so shine……

I remember my parents telling me stories of how MLK was viewed in the world. They said that the FBI would put out all kinds of lies about thing he never said or did. They wanted the world to dislike him and see him as a trouble maker. It worked for the most part back then and many said he was a trouble maker. J. Edgar Hoover made it his life’s mission to discredit MLK not for th
Change is hard, no matter who you are. A friend shared with me last night the fear she has for her husband who is a police officer and black. I was in tears as I listened to her share her fear. They are expecting their first child. 
I want to speak to my Jewish brothers and sisters for a moment. we have long known what it is like to have false reports made in the media about us. We have faced many hardships in this world and felt the hate of others simply because of who we are. It is not to say that there are not Jews who do wrong-criminal acts-because there are. There are Jews that hate others simply because of the color of their skin. We are in no way perfect. 
This is also true of black people. Our struggle has been felt for more than 400 years. As an African American Jew, it is even worse. As an African American Jewish police officer, it is just as bad. At some point, we as Jews must learn to rise above the biased news reports that are plaguing our world today and seek after truth before we post or repost a report. 
If you are a Jew and you are a member of groups that promote hate in any form, you must ask yourself one very important question: why? Why is it ok for me to claim to be a bearer of light and promote darkness? We as a people must rise above this type of stereotyping. They’ve stereotyped us all our lives. Let’s start today to bring love into the world. 
Lies are often disguised in truth. will you promote the lie for the small amount of truth it may contain?

Why it is so hard for you to understand………

I have lots of friends on my FB page that post things that I disagree with, often I find myself at a lost to know what to do about the feeling I have with the post, comment, or picture made them. Here is someone that has articulated my deepest feelings these past few days.  
As a black women, I know the TRUTH of what Tikvah Nidia Womack is saying in this post. When I was in the process of converting to Judaism, I was asked how I would deal with being hated? My response was simple, what exactly in my world would change? I am the mother of two black boys and each day I watch the news I am in complete fear of what they are facing out in the world. My son called me one day to tell me that the police pulled him over for running the stop sign. He said my son did what is called “a rabbit stop”. My son was very upset and ask the officer to give him his badge number. This put me in in mortar fear for his life. When he told me the police officer was gone I started to breath again. There are not many people who will understand why I stopped breathing at that moment. But when you see how easy it is for cops to shoot and kill black men, and prosecutors saying no charges will be filed, you lose sleep at night.  
I was asked by a dear “white” friend, when did it become legal to kill black people? I almost laughed at her question. I said, when did it become illegal? She looked puzzled. I told her the day we stop looking at each other as a “race” and see that we are all the same, will be the day KILLING will end.  
As a black Jewish woman, I know and fully understand hate. I live in it everyday of my life. When two woman go into labor, one white and the other black, they don’t feel the same joy. Soon after birth or the male child, the white woman is at peace, while the black women come to terms with the reality of having a male child. This child is born with 100 points less than his counterpart. He is black and therefore he is not as valued as the other. Old folks use to say “black peoples are born with bad credit, they must work to improve it, white people are born with top rate credit, they must work to make it bad”.   
Please don’t misunderstand my post. I am not one who cares if my friends are white or black, I love people. I’m saying I understand the post make by Tikvah. Life is very different for us.

Written by Tikvah Nadia Womack:

“To my black friends, my Jewish friends, my white friends, my ethnic friends, and multi-racial friends and all friends not covered under one of those descriptions. Please note I do not use Facebook often and I surely don’t use it as a platform, but I feel it is necessary today. Let me explain to you #blacklivesmatter from my perspective (and please note I do not speak for all black people). It means that I have to raise an adorable son with his hard working professional father and pray to G-d that I was able to teach him enough manners and common sense not to get gunned down or hurt because of the way he looks, walks, or talks. It means that I have to second guess whether I will allow my son to wear hoodies, not just so he doesn’t give off the wrong impression, but so he is not killed. It means I have to think about not just if the area he is going to is safe, but because of who he is, is it going to be safe, whether it is a different country or down the street. It means that while I was pregnant with him and before I knew I was having a son, no exaggeration, I cried! I cried because he is black and Jewish and I had no idea what his future would look like, but I knew from both ends there would be moments he wouldn’t be safe and I wouldn’t be there. Hear me, I said SAFE, not uncomfortable, not unhappy, and I didn’t use maybe; I said I KNEW he wouldn’t be SAFE! Can you imagine, have you seen my son…but I know it is true! I am writing this because I need you on some small level to hear my truth. You don’t have to agree with me, you don’t have to respond or like it, but it is my TRUTH and some of my friend’s truths. He cannot hide who he is, therefore maybe through my moments of speaking out when I can, I affect some thought, idea, or moment of potential change to try and protect him or at least through G-d’s help create an advocate or two for him. Again, please understand this is where we (again speaking for my truth) are in 2016. If you know history, you know why this truth might exist for me and maybe for others. If you deny the present, that’s fine, but you cannot erase truth. And yes, more than one truth can exist, for a while, but inevitably one truth is followed. So in this moment, I have to say I am upholding my truth, because I cannot allow others truths to dominate mine in exchange for worry and pain. R.I.P to ANYONE lost in violence, and may we all find some way towards peace while in search of truth.”

PCS’ing Binder

I made a video of my PCS binder for Germany.  I’m so excited about our move.  I hope this will help someone who is also moving overseas.  Check out my video here on our new channel.  We will be vloging as well as posting blogs about our new adventure in the Army.  

Explanations needed here……

Studying is a big part of my life.  I love and enjoy reading the entire Tanach (Bible).  There is no greater joy for me in life.  Over Shabbat I read Yechezel (Ezekiel) 43.  In this chapter, Yexhezel is sharing his conversation and vision that was give him.  

Although my questions will be out of order according to the way it is written I hope you are able to follow.  Most of my question is in regards to the commentary that follows this chapter.  The commentary is very important to me.  It helps me gain a deeper understand of what the passage is really talking about and the lesson it is teaching.  

According to verse 10 when Yechezkel is told to tell Israel about the Temple, he is told that the the people must be ashamed of this sins….and if they are ashamed of all that they have done, then make known to them the form of the Temple and its design….

The commentary explains verses 10 and 11 in the following way: 

1. There seems to be a line or verse added to the end of verse 11 in the commentary.  It says at the end of the part that speaks about the people being ashamed-at the revivification of the dead. Accordingly, this passage is a guarantee that the revivification of the dead will take place.  

• I can not find no such verse in the passage.  Neither in the English or the Hebrew. Radak explanation does not follow the passage.  But Metzudos seems to have a better explanation of it.  

How is one to truly understand when there are so many varying opinions on the same topic?  

Shabbat meal

Shabbat meal Was so good

Mung Bean Hummus

I’ve had a bag of Mung Beans sitting around for a while.  I was thinking with Shabbat coming on and me loving Hummus, why not make some hummus with them.  The issue was, I have never done it before.  So, like with any amateur cook, I searched the internet and came across this recipe.  http://www.101cookbooks.com/archives/mung-bean-hummus-recipe.html

 

So here is what I did with a few variation, (of course).   Visit the page to get full recipe.

 

 

At the end I added some Olive Oil, and Salsa.  It takes so good.  Not going to shelving your chickpeas, but still a nice change.  Hope you enjoy!

0 Dark Thirty

 

I love waking up before the sun comes out on Post.  The simple quietness of it all……My husband calls this time “0 dark thirty” because they are required to be up at 4:30 for PT each morning.  It lasts maybe an hour or so.  He is usually back home by 5:30-6 most mornings.  He runs in, showers, gets dressed, grabs whatever I have sitting on the counter for breakfast and runs out the door.  He arrives at the hospital by 0630, changes into his scrubs and its off to work.  That is the whole of our morning time.  hahaha

I always get up with him to make breakfast, and pack lunch.  Once he is out the door, it is time for me to get my day started.  That means morning prayer, some light studying, reading something to inspire me and then off to house work.  I like starting with the bedroom.  I work my way out from there and end with the kitchen.

By this time the quietness is over.  Living on a TRADOC Post is never quiet for long.

This cleaning includes but is never limited to:

1. making/changing the bed
2. straighten up nightstand and table tops (there are always books to put away)
3. cleaning the bathroom in our room (he leaves a mess every morning)
4. picking up dirty clothes (hold your nose folks, hahaha)
5. Hanging up clothes-deciding what needs to be washed or hung
6. dusting and light mopping the floors

Now off to the  2nd bedroom.

This has quickly become our “put everything in room” and by the end of the week it needs a great deal of attention.  There is so much that needs to be put away.

On to our son’s room.  This is his responsibility to keep clean.

The hall is usually clean and only requires me to dust once a week.

The living room and dining room:

1. There are always books to put away (we tend to read a lot).
2. Straighten up the sofa and love seat
3. Vacuum the rugs
4. Set table for dinner

Not a lot to do to these rooms on a daily basis.

Now the big mama  (the kitchen):

1. Wipe down the sink after doing the dishes and loading the dishwasher
2. Wipe down stove top
3. Wipe down the counters
4. Sweep/vacuum the floor
5. Put everything back that is out of its place
6. Take any and everything out of the kitchen that does not belong

Today I’m also cleaning for Shabbos.  So I’m cleaning the freezer out.  I’m also going to run through the dishwasher: burners grids and knobs, plastic utensil that are not used for food, refrigerator drawers (not at the same time).  Between each load I run an empty wash cycle to clear out anything left from the last.

I’m also going to rotate the food in my freezer and make my shopping list of things I’m out of at this time.

Once all this is done, my husband is usually home and we can talk, read and have dinner.

Then its off to bed, only to do it all again.  Some things changed from day-to-day, depending on what day of the week it is and what holiday is coming up but for the most part, this is my day which starts at 0 dark thirty.

Just something for him

My husband and I don’t really get into the Valentine’s Day thing.  We like to show our love all year-long. hahaha

I wanted to make something special for him, and this is what I did on Shabbos.  He loved it!

It was so simple to make.

2 cups sugar, 1 cup soft butter, 4 eggs, 2 3/4 cup cake flour, 2 1/2 tsp baking powder, 1 tbsp vanilla extract, 1 cup soy milk, 1 cup strawberry puree (I used frozen ones), fresh strawberries for topping.

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease and flour two 9 inch round cake pans.
2. In a large bowl, cream together the butter and sugar.
3. Add strawberry puree and vanilla extract to milk.
4. Beat in eggs one at a time, mixing well after each. Combine the flour and baking powder; stir into the batter alternately with the milk.
5.  Divide the batter evenly between the prepared pans.
6. Bake for 35 to 40 minutes in the preheated oven, or until a small knife inserted into the center of the cake comes out clean. Allow cakes to cool.
7. Remove from pan and add your favorite icing and strawberries.